-when i was all little and crazy i would be a massive ball of energy several days before christmas. i would sit by the tree and gaze at it all excited like and just unable to sleep until christmas. over the years that excitement has been slowly robbed and stolen away with retail. i normally enjoy retail as most of the year people are all nice like with the exception of the odd asshole or twat who thinks you are 1000 leagues below them. i can deal.
at this time of year though, the majority of you shoppers out there are assholes. inconsiderate pricks. selfish. and out right nasty.
you all seem to forget that people in retail are there to serve you. to help your shopping experience a bit easier. but you all seem to use us as your emotional punching bags because you are pissed off that the mall is so bloody full of shoppers. it aint my problem so lay off.
me: did you want a gift receipt with the sweater?
customer: yes. and NO TAX. and give me a box?!
(i love the deliberate non-use of please and thank you)
me: unfortunately we ran out of boxes for sweaters... all i have are these small ones?
customer: you HAVE to be kidding me!?!?!
me: (raises eyebrow) ma'am i am sure i can find better things to humor you with other than the size of my box...
customer: welll.. I DONT WANT THAT!!! just give me a paper bag then!!!
me: sure thing. by the way merry christmas!
...
see i do not understand.
if you people are that adamant to go shopping even though you are a complete douche bag do us a favor and go drown yourself in some medicated happy pills and then come see me. you will be more entertaining.
i know that will not happen and being in retail i need to just grin and bare it so i will still wish you a merry christmas even though most of you do not even deserve the time of day as i fantasize about stabbing you in the throat with my name tag.
i can not wait until boxing day. i get to work 9am to 6pm.
good times.
again.... merry christmas!
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