isis the ipod

-so i have totally conformed and got myself an ipod and i am so behind everybody i know i know but it was out of guilt because the ladies i work with bought me a new cd discman 2 years ago for my birthday and i did not want to go get an mp3 player/ipod right away and appear ungrateful and shit but now that i have an ipod i am like YOUR DISCMAN SUCKS ASS LADIES in comparison and the only reason i say that is that the ipod has games on it and i can play some game called brick and i love it because it is simple and monotonous. but anywayanyway i got it yesterday and i had a hard time figuring out what i wanted to do once i got home was it 1)play with the new ipod lil cutey patootey nano or play san andreas because i found a cheat that gave you a rocket pack and i was like NANO and so i went to play with it and it was like CHARGE ME BEFORE YOU DO ANYTHING DUMBASS and so that made the decision for me and i played san andreas poppin caps in peoples asses from the air beeeyatch. bitch and i also used my new lil bbq for the first time and we used these coals that were 'easylite' and the reason they are easylite is because they are fucking doused in lighter fluid and it stunk real bad and made the hot dogs taste like a zippo. after i digested the poisonous hot dog i fell asleep and when i woke up at 3:00am the first thing i thought of was my ipod and i totally played with it for like an hour and then went back to bed. it has not left my side since.
every where i go i take it with me.
on the way to work
in the elevator
to go get a bagel
to go smoke
the washroom
i will probably use it while raping bitch so there is like a sound track and i will listen to nancy sinatra BANG BANG while doing it too and i will not know the words but i will thrust in time to the BANG BANG part and i will look crazy and bitch will cry.
everything i do will have a soundtrack because i am able to take it anywhere. i love it.
i will be like the non-conventional autistic short irish model stomping it out in random places and the only way to take my ipod away is to pry it from my cold dead hand... bitch says it will ruin my life and i was like it already has. the end.