-i promised bitch that my next post would be titled 'malasyin glass' because on our way into surrey (he was going in for his family easter dinner and i was going for mine) on the escalator we were standing there and some asian guy was ahead of us and i made some comment about having 'asian ass' in my face and bitch was so offended and i was like I SAID MALAYSIAN GLASS and he was like you need to name your next post that so there.
-i was at work yesterday and some east indian lady was all like YES WE DO NOT HAVE TO WORK TOMORROW and i was all like ya and YOU HAVE US WHITE PEOPLE TO THANK FOR THAT BECAUSE JESUS DIED AND CAME BACK AGAIN LETS SEE YOUR GANESHA DO THAT and everybody laughed. i am hysterical.
-i am at my parents right now and dinner was good but i went to a pub with friend shari and dale before and i had too many pints of beer and so when i came home for dinner i was like IM FULL but not really just full from beer and i ate some dinner and passed out and i just woke up and they were like WE PUT YOUR BEER IN THE FRIDGE what loving parents. they have padded toilet seats and i just love them they are so comfortable i could sit on them all day and fantisize about bears or something random and i started to think about the whole phrase 'taking a shit' and who made that up and how seriously mentally retarded they are because you are not 'taking' a shit because you are not taking something away from someone you are giving so the phrase should be i am 'giving a shit' but everybody will look at me like i am some freak and be all like YOUR A GIVING A SHIT?? and i will respond GIVING A SHIT IS THE NEW BLACK and then everybody will say it so i will see what happens.
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